Posted in Inspiration, Learning, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Potential, Self Improvement

5 Tips That Will Positively Impact Your Self Esteem

Gerd Altmann @ pixabay

“You can have anything you want if you are willing to give up the belief that you can’t have it.”

Dr. Robert Anthony

Self Esteem is how we feel about ourselves. It is essential to have a positive perception of ourselves and our abilities.

Some of us appear to have a naturally positive attitude and always feel good about themselves. Other people may not, and It affects their day to day activities. I believe it is normal to have an ebb and flow based on what experiences we have and how we respond to them.

Let’s face it; we all have our good and bad days. We can be affected by our family, our friends, our co-workers, and strangers that we interact with by chance. We are affected by the nightly news and the negativity we find there.

Sometimes we are our harshest critic. When we do something wrong, we might berate ourselves with snide, nasty little comments. Been there, done that. How many times have I said to myself, ” That was dumb, why did you do that; it was stupid.” We also might think, “OMG. I hope no one saw or heard me; that was so embarrassing!”

On the other side of that is the possibility of praising ourselves. Do we? No, usually we do not recognize our worth, and we do nothing to acknowledge we were successful. We should; it is good for our self-esteem. Why do we tend to knock ourselves down, but we do nothing to build ourselves up?

We all have strengths and weaknesses. We need to focus on our strengths and work to keep improving them. We should not focus on our shortcomings or allow them to influence our decisions. I do think we need to be aware of what weaknesses we may have. We can look for ways to improve and turn the weaknesses into growth opportunities.

My attitude is that if you push me towards something that you think is a weakness, then I will turn that perceived weakness into a strength.”

~ Michael Jordan

Our self-esteem, or how we view ourselves, will influence the decisions we make. If we have high self-esteem and feel great about ourselves, it motivates us to have a productive day, get up, and do something meaningful. We want to be successful, and we want to improve. We have a positive attitude and will make the most of every situation.

If you have low self-esteem, you are less likely to be motivated. You believe that you cannot succeed, or that it will be too hard. Maybe you can do this portion of a job, but you think you are not smart enough to complete it. Because you doubt your capabilities, you are less likely to push yourself to do more, and you allow yourself to be stagnant. You think there is no sense putting in the time because you know it will be a disaster.

How can we improve, feel better about ourselves, and improve our self-esteem?

Recognize your strengths. Everyone has something they are good at, and they also have things they are not as good at doing. Examples might be someone who is outstanding in their math abilities, but has difficulty describing concepts. Maybe someone is creative and an excellent artist, but they have terrible communication skills. Do not doubt yourself because you have trouble explaining something, or do not like interacting with someone. Focus on what you are confident about and good at doing.

Practice mindfulness. Be aware of your thoughts and do not engage in any negative self-talk. When you find yourself being self-critical, be mindful of your thoughts, and remind yourself that they are only thoughts. Thoughts are not facts; they are annoying little bits of negativity, but they are not valid. Shift your way of thinking and focus on your abilities and positive attributes.

Use affirmations. The use of affirmations can be empowering. We all have these ingrained beliefs about ourselves that are not true, but they have a hold on us. Get rid of the negative nuggets you carry with you by replacing them with an affirmative statement. Make a list of affirmations. Write down the little negative nuggets and develop an affirmation about them. Choose an affirmation that is the opposite of the negative belief. Examples might be:

“I have the knowledge and experience to be promoted this year.”

“My boss values my opinion.” “I am creative.”

“I am going to work hard until I am successful.” “I have a positive attitude.”

Make a list of positive affirmations and read them every day. Keep the list where you can look at it multiple times a day or when you start having negative thoughts.

Accept Compliments. How many times have you shrugged off a compliment you have received. Instead of denying a compliment and having negative thoughts such as, “Oh, they really do not mean that. ‘ or “They are just saying that because they think they have to.” Take a few moments to respond and to contemplate the compliment. Respond with a “Thank you” or “What a nice thing to say”. When you accept compliments, they will have a positive influence and raise your self-esteem.

Practice Self Compassion. When something negative happens, such as not getting a promotion that you wanted, instead of beating yourself up and dwelling in negativity, try some self-compassion. We are compassionate toward our friends and important people in our life, so we should do the same for ourselves. Think about the conversations you had with a friend when they were working through a problem. What did you say to them to make them feel better? Do the same for yourself. Help build your self-esteem instead of knocking it down. As we often tell others, “You’ve got this.”

Building our self-esteem does take some effort, particularly if we have just had a setback or disappointment. You may enjoy helping others improve, and you should feel the same about yourself. It requires strengthening your talents, developing new ones, and creating habits like those listed above. You’ve got this; you can do it!

“Successful people have fear, successful people have doubts, and successful people have worries. They just don’t let these feelings stop them.”

– T. Harrv Eker

As always, thank you for reading my blog. Have a great day!

A re-post of a October 16, 2019 post.

Posted in Inspiration, Learning, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Potential, Self Improvement

5 Tips That Will Positively Impact Your Self Esteem

Gerd Altmann @ pixabay

“You can have anything you want if you are willing to give up the belief that you can’t have it.”

~ Dr. Robert Anthony

Self Esteem is how we feel about ourselves. It is essential to have a positive perception of ourselves and our abilities.

Some of us appear to have a naturally positive attitude and always feel good about themselves. Other people may not, and It affects their day to day activities. I believe it is normal to have an ebb and flow based on what experiences we have and how we respond to them.

Let’s face it; we all have our good and bad days. We can be affected by our family, our friends, our co-workers, and strangers that we interact with by chance. We are affected by the nightly news and the negativity we find there.

Sometimes we are our harshest critic. When we do something wrong, we might berate ourselves with snide, nasty little comments. Been there, done that. How many times have I said to myself, ” That was dumb, why did you do that; it was stupid.” We also might think, “OMG. I hope no one saw or heard me; that was so embarrassing!”

On the other side of that is the possibility of praising ourselves. Do we? No, usually we do not recognize our worth, and we do nothing to acknowledge we were successful. We should; it is good for our self-esteem. Why do we tend to knock ourselves down, but we do nothing to build ourselves up?

We all have strengths and weaknesses. We need to focus on our strengths and work to keep improving them. We should not focus on our shortcomings or allow them to influence our decisions. I do think we need to be aware of what weaknesses we may have. We can look for ways to improve and turn the weaknesses into growth opportunities.

My attitude is that if you push me towards something that you think is a weakness, then I will turn that perceived weakness into a strength.”

~ Michael Jordan

Our self-esteem, or how we view ourselves, will influence the decisions we make. If we have high self-esteem and feel great about ourselves, it motivates us to have a productive day, get up, and do something meaningful. We want to be successful, and we want to improve. We have a positive attitude and will make the most of every situation.

If you have low self-esteem, you are less likely to be motivated. You believe that you cannot succeed, or that it will be too hard. Maybe you can do this portion of a job, but you think you are not smart enough to complete it. Because you doubt your capabilities, you are less likely to push yourself to do more, and you allow yourself to be stagnant. You think there is no sense putting in the time because you know it will be a disaster.

How can we improve, feel better about ourselves, and improve our self-esteem?

Recognize your strengths. Everyone has something they are good at, and they also have things they are not as good at doing. Examples might be someone who is outstanding in their math abilities, but has difficulty describing concepts. Maybe someone is creative and an excellent artist, but they have terrible communication skills. Do not doubt yourself because you have trouble explaining something, or do not like interacting with someone. Focus on what you are confident about and good at doing.

Practice mindfulness. Be aware of your thoughts and do not engage in any negative self-talk. When you find yourself being self-critical, be mindful of your thoughts, and remind yourself that they are only thoughts. Thoughts are not facts; they are annoying little bits of negativity, but they are not valid. Shift your way of thinking and focus on your abilities and positive attributes.

Use affirmations. The use of affirmations can be empowering. We all have these ingrained beliefs about ourselves that are not true, but they have a hold on us. Get rid of the negative nuggets you carry with you by replacing them with an affirmative statement. Make a list of affirmations. Write down the little negative nuggets and develop an affirmation about them. Choose an affirmation that is the opposite of the negative belief. Examples might be:

“I have the knowledge and experience to be promoted this year.”

“My boss values my opinion.” “I am creative.”

“I am going to work hard until I am successful.” “I have a positive attitude.”

Make a list of positive affirmations and read them every day. Keep the list where you can look at it multiple times a day or when you start having negative thoughts.

Accept Compliments. How many times have you shrugged off a compliment you have received. Instead of denying a compliment and having negative thoughts such as, “Oh, they really do not mean that. ‘ or “They are just saying that because they think they have to.” Take a few moments to respond and to contemplate the compliment. Respond with a “Thank you” or “What a nice thing to say”. When you accept compliments, they will have a positive influence and raise your self-esteem.

Practice Self Compassion. When something negative happens, such as not getting a promotion that you wanted, instead of beating yourself up and dwelling in negativity, try some self-compassion. We are compassionate toward our friends and important people in our life, so we should do the same for ourselves. Think about the conversations you had with a friend when they were working through a problem. What did you say to them to make them feel better? Do the same for yourself. Help build your self-esteem instead of knocking it down. As we often tell others, “You’ve got this.”

Building our self-esteem does take some effort, particularly if we have just had a setback or disappointment. You may enjoy helping others improve, and you should feel the same about yourself. It requires strengthening your talents, developing new ones, and creating habits like those listed above. You’ve got this; you can do it!

“Successful people have fear, successful people have doubts, and successful people have worries. They just don’t let these feelings stop them.”

– T. Harrv Eker

As always, thank you for reading my blog. Have a great day!

Posted in Inspiration, Life, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Self Improvement

Quote Of The Day

“Low self-confidence isn’t a life sentence. Self-confidence can be learned, practiced, and mastered–just like any other skill. Once you master it, everything in your life will change for the better.”

Barrie Davenport
Photo by King Lip on Unsplash

As always, thank you for stopping by. Have a nice day.

While you at it; check at my new writing at Medium.com https://medium.com/1-minute-reads/the-beauty-of-flaws-619c991ddb5c

Posted in Joy, Life, Motivation, Personal Development, Positive Thinking

Quote Of The Day

“Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.”

–Helen Keller

Photo by Cherry Laithang on Unsplash

As always, thanks for stopping by. Have faith in yourself today!

Posted in Inspiration, Motivation, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Self Improvement

Quote Of The Day

You don’t have to have it all figured out to move forward, just take the first step.”

Unknown
Photo by Lindsay Henwood on Unsplash

As always, thanks for stopping by. Take a step forward today.

Posted in Communication, Curiosity, Excitement, Inspiration, Joy, Motivation, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Potential, Self Improvement

Let’s Be Different! It’s OK, Really, And Here Is Why

Photo by Randy Fath on Unsplash

If you’re always trying to be normal you will never know how amazing you can be,

Maya Angelou

I have always been one of those people who always played it safe. It felt safer to go about my life without drawing attention to myself. Don’t say this, don’t wear that, be careful of my facial expressions and tone of voice. Heaven forbid, don’t raise my voice, do not question and, do not make direct eye contact.

I was painfully shy as a young child, and an introvert as a young adult. Not awkwardly so, but I never put myself out there. I became comfortable and accepting of that. As I entered the work force it was a challenge. It was necessary to push myself. In some ways I guess you could say I became two people and it worked.

It was never easy, but so very necessary to be able to loosen up enough to communicate well. It felt so uncomfortable at first. It was itchy, prickly uncomfortable like I was wearing wool underwear. You know, like feeling you wanted to get out of your skin, shed it like a snake.

Thank goodness, I am a calm person. At least most of the time. I can sort of suck my breath in and then relax myself. Not something that someone can see ( I don’t think), but an internal process–sort of like a minuscule meditation in my mind and body. I do internalize most everything. It works for me. I am not sure I would recommend it, though.

All of us are different. We each have multiple layers, and that’s okay. It would be boring if we were all the same. What the heck would we talk about? What would we do? We might as well be robots.

Having lived all these years, I finally have come to the conclusion that it is okay to be different, and I wish I had realized that earlier in life. I wish I could have been that slightly wacky person who everyone laughed at but secretly wanted to be.

The game of life is best played not merely by the rules but with a sense of imagination and childlike wonder.

~Anne Scottlin

Remember Pippi Longstockings? Different, heck ya, but so exciting and so fun. I think we should be more like that. More relaxed, less intense, and seeing the delight in everyday life.

Sure, we have to be serious sometimes, but we should not have to conform to every rule and every way of doing something. I believe the people who are different, and a little quirky, have so much to add to life. They bring a different perspective and a refreshing flavor, or nuance, to everything. They make things more interesting.

In personal relationships and professional settings, it is essential to listen to all viewpoints. I think there is a tendency to assume that being conservative is always the best way. By following that way of thinking, we bypass that unique little nuance that could make everything much more exciting and enjoyable.

I know I am not alone in putting on a front, a facade, to the outside world. We do not show our true selves, we don’t put it all out there . The reason will be different for each of us. Self-preservation comes to mind, being fearful, wanting to fit in and be accepted.

Everyone is unique. If you are confident and vivacious, or shy and quiet, it is okay. Be who you are. Trying to conform is tiring, irritating, and it is not necessary. Be yourself. If you are different than everyone else celebrate. Let all of your layers show. You can be shy and quiet and be quirky too. You can be confident and vivacious but also an introvert.

Life is short. Enjoy it. Do something different, something unexpected. Be Pippi Longstockings. Mix it up. Be a little crazy on occasion. How many of us do the same thing every day, day in and day out, and repeat! Boring.

Change it up!. Listen to your inner self and try something new. As a result, you will shine and be amazing.

By being different, you gain a different mindset. You will question the way things are accomplished and also why. You will think about ways to do them differently and make them better. It is easy to accept the status quo, and it becomes uncomfortable to make the needed changes. Not making those changes can lead to a boring, stagnant mindset. Be different and make a change. It is a good thing for everyone.

You are more interesting. We are attracted to people who are different, wacky in a good way. We want to know them, we are curious about them and sometimes we wish we were them. If you do things differently than everyone else, you dress differently, talk differently, you will be intriguing. People will want to know more about you.

You will be a more confident stronger individual. When I was working hard to advance at work, it was exhausting at times because I was trying so hard to conform and be the person I thought I was required to be. It was challenging to be all those things and still maintain who I was. In the end, I became a much stronger person, a better person.

Being different helps you appreciate other people. You will understand and accept other people who are different, while still accepting those who more readily conform. You will easily make good quality friendships.

“Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.” 

Apple Inc.

Let’s be amazing! Be different and embrace all your quirkiness.

Posted in Communication, Motivation, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Potential, Self Improvement

Looking For The Best You? Clear Your Mind And Push Hard To Open The Door To A Better You

Photo by Mohit Sharma on Unsplash

Push yourself, because no one else is going to do it for you.

Unknown

Did you think it would be easy? Welcome to reality. Life is wonderful. It’s also hard. It takes work. Sometimes the work is easy and sometimes it is mind numbing hard.

We do not pop into this world all set and ready to go. We have to learn to do everything. Doing anything new always requires work of some kind. The great thing is we can learn. We just have to be willing to put in the effort.

Sometimes we are scared to try something new. What if we fail? The answer to that is just keep trying. Good things are well worth the effort required.

What about the door? There will be many doors we believe are closed but are they really? We think they are and in our mind we have decided they would be really hard to open. It is up to each of us to open ourselves to change so we become stronger and start to believe we can push the doors open.

When we attempt to learn something new and we really suck at it we automatically want to give up. We look for an easy way out. We don’t want to put in the work required and sometimes we are just comfortable with the way things are. Why change?

If we just take some time to understand our reaction we would realize that we are making excuses. We learn new things all the time and don’t think about it until we are faced with something that is a challenge.

Remember when you were a kid and you quickly learned so many things? We did not even think about it, we just went for it. Why? Because we weren’t scared to do new things. We had not learned to be cautious or scared. We thought we could do anything.

What happened to that positive attitude? Life happened. We may have tried something and were hurt. Our parents or friends told us not to do something. Someone said it was scary. We tried something and it did not work or we did something in front of someone and became embarrassed. We are influenced by others.

We need to stop being so easily influenced by the negativity of others. We should not listen to others or to the voices in our head that tell us we can’t. Try it anyway. We’re adults now right? So we can make you own decisions.

It’s time to be open minded. It is time to try new things. We should be excited to try something new. Sometimes we are, but most of the time not so much.

What do we have to do to embrace new experiences? How do we become open to trying?

  • Accept the fact that there may be a better way to do things. Recognize that you do not have the answer for everything and that you may not always be correct. Sometimes you are just too comfortable with where you are. You have done well at your job or in relationships, You’re great at doing multiple things like playing a great game of basketball or writing and presenting projects at work.

The question is can you be better. The answer is more than likely, yes, you can. You can be better in what you already do and you can be better doing something new and different as well. You will be expanding your life.

  • To make changes to the way you think it is necessary to make yourself vulnerable. You have opened yourself up to the possibility of change and possible failure. There is risk involved. Scary, isn’t it.
  • When you become more open minded and are trying new things you will probably makes mistakes. Mistakes are part of learning. You have probably heard the saying, “Fail Forward”. It is a proven fact that we learn the most when we fail.

“Failure is the key to success; each mistake teaches us something.”

– Morihei Ueshiba
  • You become stronger by opening up yourself to change. When you do something that is new, something that scares you, it can be life changing. If you are successful that is certainly a win. If you try and fail and pick yourself up and try again that is an even bigger win. Each attempt you make you learn and become a stronger person. You are better for it.
  • You become more confident. It is a great feeling to be open minded and open doors to new ideas, new people and new experiences. Your life is richer. It may not necessarily affect you monetarily. Your life will be richer because you are experiencing so much. You feel good about yourself.
  • It may not be easy to learn to think differently but it is so important. Look for new ideas and new ways to do things. Read, but read something different. Listen to other people, but not the same people. How about joining a discussion group. Watch something different instead of the same old stuff on TV. How about webinars, like TED talks. Open Your Mind. Expose yourself to the wonderful diversity of life.
  • The most important part of being open minded is knowing what is important. How you conduct your life will help determine how successful you are opening doors. Are you friendly and are you sincere? There is a t-shirt I really like which states, “In a world where you can be anything…Be Kind”. Are you kind? Do you help people or are you in it for yourself? The way you approach life and how you conduct yourself has a big impact on how easy it is to open doors. Opening a door for someone else may lead to you having a door opened for you as well.
Photo by Nathan Lemon on Unsplash

As always, Thank You for reading my blog. What good will you do today?