Posted in Communication, Motivation, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Potential, Self Improvement

Starting My Blog Has Been An Eye Opening Experience

Photo by Tsolmon Naidandorj on Unsplash

Eyes wide open or so I thought. I decided I wanted to start a blog, and it has been interesting, to say the least. Not exactly what I expected. It is more.

My interest in blogging was born from intrigue. I was so curious about my sons and what they were doing. One is posting videos on YouTube, and one develops websites and has a Social Media Management business. It planted a seed in my mind.

Their interest became my interest, and my mind went whirling. Did I want to attempt something, and if so, what? I had absolutely no knowledge of anything to do with Social Media. I was not on Facebook or Twitter, and I do not even have a cell phone. Definitely behind the times. *** their sites are listed at the bottom of this article.

I settled on writing a blog. Anyone can write, can’t they? That’s true in a sense, but can everyone write well? Then there was everything else that goes along with a blog. Who knew? Certainly, not me.

You have to either create your website or find a platform to write on. I could not afford to pay someone to build my website & I definitely was not going to do it myself. So I started researching for an alternative. I chose a free WordPress blog site, and my journey began.

To help understand my journey and the angst I have felt from time to time here is my real reason for starting my blog. I am a 73-year-old woman who has been retired for years. I was looking for an outlet to express myself and to keep my mind active. I was feeling stagnant and did not like the feeling.

The name of my blog is, “adjusting my time frame,” which references my age and my mindset. I did not want to stay still and accept that this was all there is. I felt like I was falling behind and becoming the stereotypical “old” person. No, I am not ready for that—time to do some adjusting.

How do I like it? Most of the time, I love it. There have been moments when I have wondered what the heck am I doing. It has been downright frustrating at times.

Not being proficient on social media made it difficult in the beginning, and there is still so much for me to learn. Just creating my blog space on WordPress was a lot of work for me. I have always been able to learn fairly quickly, but this was a challenge at times. There were lots of choices and decisions.

I just kept picking away at it. Each day I would read and analyze, and then one day, I just decided to go for it and hit the publish button. That felt really good! Now when I look back at my first few blogs, I laugh. It has been about six months now, and I have learned so much.

Sometimes I get frustrated because with blogging comes the lust for acceptance and approval. Each time I published a post, I was looking to see how many people read it, how many people liked it, and how many people followed me. Did I receive any comments?

Like most humans, I like immediate gratification. I want everyone to love my blog. Silly isn’t it. I started the blog for myself, so I should be content with just that.

I have found that each time I write, I want it to be better. I want to be a great writer. I have found I have a lot to learn. I consider myself an acceptable writer but not really good and certainly not great.

Most of what I have experienced is so typical. There is nothing special about my experiences. I know I have to keep doing what I am doing, and I will improve as I go. So many people start a blog and become discouraged. That is easy to do.

I have stopped trying to do too much. At first, I researched and looked at so many promotional sites, places I had never even heard of before. I wasted a lot of time doing that, but I felt I had to play the promotional game. No, I don’t. Not for me, I just have to remain focused.

I am starting to relax a little and fall into a routine. I have established a set schedule and always post three times each week on the same days.

Everyone says it is essential to have a specialized niche when you write. My posts are mostly related to personal and professional growth.

The downside to that is I have many other topics I want to write about. So now I question my initial choice; if you are thinking of writing a blog that is an important thing to consider.

Spend a lot of time deciding what you want to write about. I cannot stress enough how important it is to be comfortable with either writing in a specific niche, or not.

To satisfy my interest in writing other topics, I have now started writing at Medium.Com. You can view my stories at:

Am I happy I started my blog? Absolutely! Do I regret it in any way? Not at all. Blogging is an excellent way to express yourself. It is a place not only to share knowledge but also to gain knowledge. It does not matter what age you are, young or old, writing a blog can be beneficial for you.

Blogging was just what I needed. It has provided everything I was looking for and more. In some ways it’s magical!

As always, thank you for reading my blog. Create a little magic today!

*** and

Posted in Inspiration, Learning, Motivation, Positive Thinking, Self Improvement

What Is The Best Skill To Invest In? Create Goals Or Create Habits?

Photo by Drew Beamer on Unsplash

“First we make our habits, then our habits make us.”

— Charles C. Nobel

We all have, or should have, goals; small goals & big goals are what keep us moving forward in life, and help us become successful. Goals are good; they are positive and helpful. They can keep us on track.

Goals are not all we need.

There is a difference between goals and habits. When we want to accomplish something like getting a promotion, learning a new language, or losing weight; we set a goal. Let’s say we want to be promoted to the next highest level at work. We set a realistic goal to earn that promotion in a year. We set the goal, and we have a plan on how to get there.

There are a couple of things that might happen.

Let’s say you get to the end of the year and you are successful. That’s great, you achieved your goal, but something else also happens. You congratulate yourself, and you settle into your new position. You stop doing all the good things that helped you to reach the goal. You become complacent. You did not create new habits. To maintain your new position, and to keep improving, you need to form habits.

You also do not have complete control over factors that could affect reaching your goal. The company you work for may downsize, and the position you want could be eliminated as a result. You may be in an accident or become ill. We may have an unrealistic view of what is needed to accomplish the goal and decide it is too much effort.

Habits are more relevant and more productive. Habits are instinctual and become an automatic part of your routine.

“Depending on what they are, our habits will either make us or break us. We become what we repeatedly do.”

Sean Covey

By changing our focus from achieving specific goals to creating positive long-term habits, we can make continuous improvement a way of life.

Goals rely on motivation that we will receive an award such as an increase in income, or praise from someone we respect and want to impress. They are therefore short term.

Habits are something we do automatically, and so they have a life long effect on virtually everything we do. One example is money. If you want to accumulate and acquire wealth, you establish a habit early on in life that each week you will take a percentage of your pay and put it in savings. You do not use that money for anything else. It will become a habit, something you do not even think about, and an excellent practice to maintain.

If you want to establish a habit of reading or exercise, you can do it. Start small and exercise 10 minutes each day. Do the same with reading, decide to read a chapter a day, or to read for 15 minutes. It will become a habit and one that you automatically do. Quite likely you will do both for an increasing length of time, but always continue to do at least the minimum.

When we want to attain something in our lives, we will do well to invest our time in forming positive habits, rather than concentrating on a specific goal. The goal will end, and the habit will continue.

We need both. We need goals to provide direction and push us forward. They are suitable for the short term. Forming habits gives us the ability to keep performing and continually improve because they guide us all the time; every day.

“Our character is basically a composite of our habits. Because they are consistent, often unconscious patterns, they constantly, daily, express our character.”

Stephen Covey

As always, thank you for reading my blog. What are your habits?

Posted in Inspiration, Learning, Life, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Potential, Self Improvement

Perfection – It Does Not Exist – Be Perfectly Imperfect Instead

Photo by Erol Ahmed on Unsplash

Perfection itself is imperfection. 

Vladimir Horowitz

My son and I were just talking about perfection yesterday afternoon. He was starting to restore the finish on a vintage Volkswagen Beetle, and was working hard to get the finish as perfect as possible. He understood that it was not going to be a perfect result. There were too many existing flaws that could not be worked away so it would be perfectly imperfect.

Our conversation lead me to this article. We want to be perfect but there really is no such thing.

“One of the basic rules of the universe is that nothing is perfect. Perfection simply doesn’t exist…..Without imperfection, neither you nor I would exist”

― Stephen Hawking

Throughout school and work you may have been required to take a personality assessment. I was always labeled a perfectionist. Did I agree with the results? Heck No! But there you have it; that was my label.

The point being that society has taught us to strive for the impossible; perfection. Working hard to do the best possible job is not a bad thing. I think that should be everyone’s goal.

The problem is no one can attain perfection and we should not be 100% judged by that standard. We are told by our parents, our teachers and our bosses that our work has to be perfect. If you play sports of any kind, the goal is perfection.

As a result individually we push ourselves to do just that; be perfect. We are our own best and worse judge. We work hard to achieve the perfect test score, present the best project presentation, and win every game.

When we fall a little short, we are our worse critic. We continually evaluate ourselves, and we wonder how we are being judged by others. It is a constant fear that we are not measuring up. When you set a goal and you do not quite get there you feel as if you are a failure.

Instead of understanding that you cannot be perfect you continue to push yourself and start to feel that you are incapable, that you are not smart enough. You feel incompetent. You are frustrated with everything and you are stressed. You spend a lot of time thinking about how you could have been better or done something differently.

You fail to recognize that you are doing a great job and are successful. When someone tells you that you have done a great job you do not acknowledge, or accept, the fact that they are right; you did do a great job. In your mind you are not good enough; you are not perfect.

Not only does perfectionism not exist, being locked in the round-robin of constantly pursuing it, it is detrimental to our health and well being. Studies have found that perfectionists have higher levels of stress, burnout, anxiety, and depression. One such study published in Medical News Today in 2018 explains in more depth how perfectionism can seriously harm your mental health and overall well being.

No one is perfect. We all have flaws and imperfections; we make mistakes. That is normal and should be expected. If you are a perfectionist, or lean n that direction like I do, you need to accept who you are. Realize that life would be boring if everyone was perfect. It is our quirky little imperfections that make us interesting and give us character.

When you make mistakes it is important to accept them and to use them to learn. Look at what happened, why it did not work, and then look for ways that you can improve. It is a growth opportunity. Use that information in the future.

When you receive compliments be receptive and don’t discount your abilities. Pay attention to what they are saying and you will realize that others do respect and appreciate your abilities.

All of us are imperfect. You can still strive to be the best in what you do. There is nothing wrong with that and I think it is a positive way to live life. We are individuals who bring something different to whatever we do. We all have strengths and weaknesses. Each of us make an impression because of our imperfections. Strive to be Perfectly Imperfect.

Stop trying to ‘fix’ yourself; you’re NOT broken! You are perfectly imperfect and powerful beyond measure.”

~ Steve Maraboli

As always, thanks for reading my blog. Have a Perfectly Imperfect day.

Posted in Coping, Inspiration, Learning, Life, Positive Thinking, Potential, Self Improvement

Quote Of The Day

“Change is not something that we should fear. Rather, it is something that we should welcome. For without change, nothing in this world would ever grow or blossom, and no one in this world would ever move forward to become the person they’re meant to be.”

–B.K.S Iyengar
Photo by Ross Findon on Unsplash

As always, thanks for stopping by. Have a great day.

Posted in Inspiration, Learning, Motivation, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Potential, Self Improvement

Consistency And Why It Is Important – A Strategy To Try

Photo by Nicola Ricca on Unsplash

Success is neither magical nor mysterious. Success is the natural consequence of consistently applying basic fundamentals.”

  ― E. James Rohn

For success in business and every aspect of our life, we talk about doing many things.

We read about and listen to virtually the same nuggets of information over and over again. Such as:

We need to be learning new things by taking classes, reading books, and listening to webinars. We have to set goals, be willing to change, and adapt to every situation.

We should be aware of what is going on around us, be able to present ourselves in a certain way, and be able to read and understand body language.

We should not fear competition and use it as a challenge to do better. We need to believe in ourselves and we should find support, such as a mentor, family members, and friends.

We should always keep trying, and if we fail, we need to look at what did not work, make some changes, and try again. We can use failure as a challenge to do better.

We should value diversity, not be afraid of what might appear different, be willing to change to be better, and respect the ideas of others.

We should always live in the moment, not dwell on the past, or focus on the future; focus on today.

We should set goals and maintain a schedule.

These are all exactly what we should be doing. Most of do these things or attempt to on some level. What brings them together, and what helps us to be successful is consistency.

Consistency is like the glue that holds everything together. When we practice being consistent, we can develop a routine and build momentum. Being consistent develops new habits.

That is where I think we let ourselves down; we do not follow through. We set goals, and we have our schedules, and we may do them for a while, but then we stop.

We all have goals that we do not follow through on. Mine is exercise. I have no excuse, I have the time, but I always push it off to do something else; like writing. I will get on my treadmill a couple of times a week; better than nothing, but far from enough.

“It’s not what we do once in a while that shapes our lives. It’s what we do consistently.”

― Anthony Robbins

Is there a magic pill that will help you be consistent? No, but I did read about something this morning that makes perfect sense. I’m not sure it will work for you or me, but it is worth a try.

It is called the paper clip strategy. I found this article this morning published in Business Insider:

It tells the story of a 23-year-old stockbroker who was successful because of a strategy he used. Each morning he would place two jars on his desk. He filled one jar with 120 paper clips and the other was empty. He would make business phone calls, and each time he completed a call, he would transfer one paper clip to the other jar. He continued making calls, doing no other tasks, until all the paper clips had been transferred into the other jar.

The use of the paper clips or any other object you might choose gives you a visual cue. Being able to transfer all the paper clips each day consistently will form a habit, and it is an easy way for each of us to keep motivated and feel successful.

So how am I going to incorporate this technique? There are some suggestions in the Business Insider article that resonated with me because I need to do them. I need to drink more water, and I am not good at doing it; I focus on it for a day or two, and then I conveniently forget. Of course, there is the treadmill that sits right around the corner from where I am writing. I could also set a goal for the number of words to write each day or the number of stories.

I am going to give it a try. How about you? Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day-in and day-out.

Robert Collier

As always, thank you for reading my blog. Have a paper clip day!

Posted in Inspiration, Learning, Life, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Self Improvement

Is Patience Becoming A Lost Art? How You Can Improve Your Ability To Be More Patient

Photo by Anthony Ginsbrook on Unsplash

“Water does not resist. Water flows. When you plunge your hand into it, all you feel is a caress. Water is not a solid wall, it will not stop you. But water always goes where it wants to go, and nothing in the end can stand against it. Water is patient. Dripping water wears away a stone. Remember that, my child. Remember you are half water. If you can’t go through an obstacle, go around it. Water does.”

Margaret Atwood, The Penelopiad

Patience: quiet, steady perseverance; even-tempered care; diligence: to work with patience or the ability to keep calm in the face of disappointment, distress or suffering, 

A excellent ability, patience. Do you spend time with someone who has forgotten the concept? Doesn’t it irritate you when they are always displaying their quick flair of anger at the tiniest thing? The computer file does not load fast enough, traffic is slow, they have to wait in line, or when someone places them on hold while on the telephone.

I wonder if they realize the effect they may have on someone who is a witness to their behavior. When I see someone’s lack of patience, I find it irritating and sometimes depressing.

I would prefer to spend time with that patient beagle in the picture above then a person who continually displays a lack of patience.

There was an article I read recently that referenced a woman who was always cheerful and polite at her customer service position. She received an offer for a job at a firm that was her dream position because of her positive attitude, which included a large dose of patience. Do you think she would have been offered that same position if she displayed impatience with her customers every day?

Most of us occasionally have a bad day when we lose our patience, but then we bounce right back. It is concerns me that I see more people displaying impatience and poor behavior like it is reasonable and acceptable.

We can learn to control impatience by determining what triggers that response. Is it standing in line? Is it a traffic detour or construction zone with a flagman that infuriates you?

When that happens, start by taking a deep breath and thinking about what is making you impatient. It may be inconvenient, or you visualize it that way, but is it really? Is it a five-minute delay? In the context of your day is that a big deal? No, it is not.

My husband and I go almost everywhere together. I am his driver because his health requires it. I take him somewhere like the post office, or a book sale, he goes inside, and I wait. God bless him, he is a talker, and what should be a short stop may often turn into a longer time. I understand his need to have personal contact, and it is beneficial for him, but when I sit and think about what I want to do for the day I could be irritated, but I have chosen not to be. I always have a notebook with me, and I use that time to make a grocery list or reorganize my appointment list, jot down ideas for writing, etc. I will listen to music, or I will take a book to read.

It should be easy to find a simple solution to what may be a problem for many. There is always a way to fill the few minutes you have to wait. Listen to music, think about what movie you want to watch, or what you are going to do on the weekend. Easy Peasy.

Another enlightening practice might be to view the situation and take a step back; have you done the same thing yourself? The answer may be yes. In this busy world we live in, it appears that we all want to be first at some point or another. Use that reflection to learn and grow. Hopefully, it will help you stop the next time, and react more positively.

Practice mindfulness. Mindfulness is the ability to stay in the moment, the here and now, without any judgment. When we make mindfulness a daily habit, the tendency we have to put ourselves first, and to become impatient when we have to wait, should become a non-event. We have better awareness and control of our emotions, and we respond better to adverse events, such as having to wait in a long line, etc.

“Mindfulness means being awake. It means knowing what you are doing.” 

— Jon Kabat-Zinn

Modify your time schedules. I know someone who is always late; you can bet money on it. If you have that tendency, and you are easily irritated when something happens to hold you up, you need to make some changes. Why add stress to your life by trying to do too much, or not being realistic about the time required.

Make a schedule for each day and be realistic about your goals for the day. Rearrange your schedule, delete what is not necessary, or move something to another day. No one knows you like you do. No one can make you move faster, plan better, or be more realistic. All those things only you can control.

As we look at the world today, it is apparent that we all need to practice patience. We need to slow down, take a deep breath, smile, relax, and wait. Live in the moment always.

Patience is not the ability to wait. Patience is to be calm no matter what happens, constantly take action to turn it to positive growth opportunities, and have faith to believe that it will all work out in the end while you are waiting.”

Roy T. Bennett,

As always, thank you for reading my blog. Practice Patience today.

Posted in Inspiration, Learning, Life, Personal Development, Positive Thinking, Self Improvement

Quote Of The Day

“There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.”

– Ernest Hemmingway
Photo by Rémi Walle on Unsplash

As always, thanks for stopping by. Show someone compassion today.