Truth be told, it scares the bejesus out of me. At first I was okay; we can do this. I still had this other world feeling. No one really had much information and I felt disconnected. Then as more and more facts, and non-facts, were put forth I was like “shit”, we are all in trouble.
When I wake up in the morning it is what I think of first and it is the last thing I think about at night as I go to bed. The fear and uncertainty wakes me during the night and disrupts my sleep.
I am trying to take a step back and calm down.
“Smile, breathe, and go slowly.”Thich Nhat Hanh
Don’t misunderstand, I am not in a full force panic, it is more like a slow simmer which sometimes I can start to feel boil over. Like the image above I feel like there is a fog surrounding me and I can’t see through it to the other side. I do not know what is there. What will happen?
We are cautious. We stay at home and we practice social distancing. We do not visit anyone, nor do we have others come to our home. We wash our hands. I am learning as we go what are the best practices and following those.
Today we needed computer paper and my husband wanted to go to Walmart. My heart fluttered. I did not want to go. We did have to go to the post office and while he was inside my husband mentioned what he needed to do. The person behind the counter offered to buy the paper when she went shopping this evening. How nice is that? She knows my husband is at risk and she told him we should not attempt it ourselves.
When we go shopping I am the one going into the store, although my husband has ventured in a few times. He will not be doing that in the future. Sine the beginning of this pandemic I have always worn gloves while shopping but I am going to be more cautious from now on. The next time we go grocery shopping I am wearing a protective mask and gloves.
Last night we were given advice from a medical professional in regard to my husband’s health condition. My husband has COPD and his lungs are already dying so he is at high risk. The instructions we received were that he should stay home. When I arrive home from shopping I should remove my shoes and leave them outside. Then I should remove all my clothing and it should immediately be washed. I should take a shower immediately as well.
My husband should not touch the groceries, the bags, etc. I will need to wash and disinfect everything I bring into the house.
Sounds extreme doesn’t it? It is just not worth the risk of not doing this.
None of us, even the experts, know exactly what to expect or how long this will last. It is having a huge impact on our lives and I believe life will be slightly altered as we come out on the other side. There will be a greater appreciation of all the small things we took for granted before the virus.
In the meantime I am practicing the advice of Thich Nhat Hanh in the quote above…I will smile, breathe, and go slowly.
I wish all of you the very best. Stay safe and I look forward to living on the other side of the fog.
Thank you for stopping by today and reading my blog.